Failure is an event (not a person)
By Brian Buffini, Chairman and Founder, Buffini & Company
I’ve owned 47 businesses throughout my life. 46 of them made money. One did not. Although that one failed, ultimately it was the one that taught me the most.
It took six hours to make a bad deal and six years to recover from it. But that $2 million loss has made me a fortune because of what it taught me about myself. It also taught me the importance of researching a business and taking calculated risks.
At that time, I had all these successes. In fact, I probably got carried away with my successes. I probably got a little prideful about my success. I started to take it for granted. Started to think I couldn’t make a mistake.
So, I cavalierly walked into a business environment. When it didn’t go right, right away, I thought, “Well, I can overpower this.” I doubled down. I spent more money, more time, more effort.
Eventually, it turned out that it was a bad business decision. I hadn’t researched it enough and I didn’t listen to feedback from others. I had become a little full of myself and I paid a huge price.
But it wasn’t just the money I lost, although that was, of course, significant. I also lost my confidence in myself. I started to doubt myself. I started to be overly cautious.
It was when I recalled and reflected on a quote from my mentor, Zig Ziglar, that things started turning around.
“Failure is an event, not a person.”
That quote had to rattle around in my brain a lot. Ultimately, I told myself, “What am I going to learn from this?”
Let me share three things that failure taught me, and that I believe can help you too.
1. Failure Is Feedback, Not an Identity
Everyone in life is going to make mistakes. Everyone who ever dares to do anything of any significance is going to fail.
It’s part of the feedback mechanism that gives you information about yourself on how you process things and how you need to process things differently going forward.
Don’t doubt your instincts. Don’t doubt your sense that you can achieve and believe in yourself but do your research first. Be willing to listen to people who argue against your positions.
When I was thinking of starting Buffini & Company, I had very, very important people in my life try to talk me out of it. I listened to their concerns and realized some were very valid that I hadn’t thought about. I realized I needed to listen and think those concerns through. That helped me better prepare and realize that I was ready, I believed in what I wanted to accomplish and I was willing to go for it.
2. A Loss Shows You Who’s on Your Side
A loss also shows you who you can count on when the chips are down. When I had this failure, it was amazing who suddenly wasn’t returning my phone calls. People didn’t want to be associated with failure.
Tom Kelly was not like that. For years, he’s been a great golfing buddy of mine. We never really talked about much other than golf and sports. But he knew I’d been through a tough time and instead of shunning me like so many others did, he stuck by me. So when he offered words of counsel, I listened.
“You know, it isn’t how far you fall, it’s how high you bounce,” he reminded me.
And as Maya Angelou said, “I can be changed by what happens to me, but I refuse to be reduced by it.”
That’s ultimately what happened to me.
3. Get Back on the Horse (Just Not the Same One)
If you’ve experienced a failure, the key is to get back on the horse. Now, this is important. You don’t want to get back on the exact horse you just fell off. But get back up there.
Again, failure is an event, not a person. You need to keep risking. You need to keep growing. You need to keep daring to win.
Failure is just feedback. And if you take it as such, you will step into your future destiny. You’ll achieve what it is you’re capable of.
For more insights on reaching your goals, creating a business that thrives, and Living the Good Life, watch episodes of my all-new podcast at thebrianbuffinishow.com.
